Fringe Therapy: Tony Law

So, tell me about your Fringe show.Tony Law: It is called Revenge of the Dog of Time. It's a bit of stand up for a while and then a story breaks ...

feature (edinburgh) | Read in About 3 minutes
Published 24 Jul 2007
So, tell me about your Fringe show.

Tony Law: It is called Revenge of the Dog of Time. It's a bit of stand up for a while and then a story breaks out. Not a play. Not a sketch show. And not simply a stand-up show. Just silliness for an hour. The story goes like this: a dastardly evil man wants to impose upon the world his "World Warming Machine." He needs to travel back in time to deploy it and the only way he can do that is to kidnap a time travelling sausage dog. I cant allow him to do that.

Describe your idea of perfection.

TL: The Pantheon in Rome of course. I was there when they started building it. I have to admit I was skeptical that it would work at all, let alone last. Hadrian built more than that wall you know. I was there for that too. But I was on the side of the Picts and I had kept winding them up about the Romans. Telling them: "You know the Romans think you are all idiots don't you?" And then the Picts were like: "I'll blindin show them who's a frickin idiot!" (rough translation). Then they would go and raid the Romans so they had to build the wall after that.

Tell me about your earliest childhood memory.

TL: A black Swan called Corvus. No wait! that was the third.... the first was playing poker in a tavern. Sorry, that was the second. The first childhood memory was running through a meadow with Laura Ingalls.

Describe your most vivid or recurring dreams.

TL: Going into battle beside Ghengis Khan on a little Mongolian War pony that was struggling under my 21st century size. Poor little pony. I called him Sinbad and he hated that.

Describe your worst personal experience.

TL: Working in a Hog Abattoir. Princess Diana's funeral or at least the days leading up to it. I was driving a garbage truck for the royal parks and i had to clean up after the "mourners." They drove me nuts the freaks. I quit the night before the actual funeral in disgust and shouted at some of them to "go home and look after your own families you sanctimonious, self-indulgent, ghouls!" Well, at least i wished i had. I did quit though.

What is the first thing you think about when you wake up?

TL: My Lady! Which is a metaphor for My Lady. She is the first being I see every morning, so it's natural. Unless Cartridge Davison, my time travelling sausage dog, is sat on my chest staring at me.

How is your relationship with your mother?

TL: It's great now. I have forgiven her for making me work down the mines as a child. Trinidadian mothers are like that though, always making their kids work down mines and then singing Soca songs at the end of the day as if that makes it ok! But lets let bygones...

What is your biggest regret in life?

TL: No regrets openly. Privately though, I wish I had learnt to do grammar and that... And not killed that man.